November 24, 2004

Surf bums

I must report that I have just seen some extremely brave men riding motorbikes very fast and doing somersaults and other absolutely ridiculous things ON SNOW. And they seem to be enjoying it. As well as this, lots of people seem to have paid money to watch these silly men do these very silly things. Perhaps the same facet of human nature is coming in to play as the kind that arises when one witnesses a car crash or a crime. Maybe deep down they all want to see these lunatics (I'm not being judgemental, they're definitely loonies) break themselves into tiny lttle pieces.

"Oh yes, broken back, saw three of those last week Dave ."

"That's nothing, I saw a bloke put his foot into his own kidney a couple of days ago. That was special."

It's like some kind of testosterone-charged A+E ward. Without the pensioners.

In case you're wondering I'm not actually at this 'event' watching the loonies. It's on telly. This same channel broadcasts endless clips of skateboarders breaking their faces and arms. In all honesty it should probably have a 15 certificate. Some of this stuff really is pretty gruesome. Then again, I can't chastise the voyeurs. I get a massive thrill from watching maniacs (worse than the loonies) surfing/falling down 30 metre waves somewhere in the middle of the ocean. It is obviously VERY IMPRESSIVE, but I suppose a large part of my motive in watching is that I wonder what the horrific aftermath would be like if they fell over. Just for a moment, imagine a 30 metre wave travelling at 50 mph landing on your head. Just try. I can't. It would probably be similar to having a small house dropped on you, which is not something I'd like to happen to me or any of my immediate family thanks all the same. Yet some people will actively seek out this danger. For fun. My mother needn't worry about me doing this kind of thing any time soon. I'm not genetically designed for it. Crap, I often sprain my neck going to the toilet, so anything involving water, speed, me and crashing would definitely be the end of Lagomorph as we know it.


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